Category: negative attitudes

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New Beginnings for Children in 2020

I believe we ALL need a “re-start” sometimes.

Children need to feel optimistic and feel they can get back on track.

We have written a transformational and very effective course to help children develop GROWTH MIND-SETS. This has been fully researched and shown to be highly successful.

We call it EQ4KIDZ and we have developed specific strategies to help children grow their resilience, confidence, positive outlooks and much more.

We help them develop a sense of gratitude about themselves and what they already have and then we help them to set realistic goals.

We also help children develop planning procedures and show them how to view life from the glass half full perspective.

Children are helped to be assertive, determine their strengths and weaknesses and to realise we are ALL smart! (But often in very different ways)

All attending children are taken through a process to help them determine their stronger and weaker intelligences, so they know how to strengthen their academic strengths by harnessing their strengths and talents!

Optimism can be taught but needs careful planning and persistence.

Both teachers and parents need to model optimistic behaviours by using positive language and actions. See this link for ideas to achieve this!

http://www.ahaparenting.com/parenting-tools/emotional-intelligence/optimism

There are great benefits to be had (for both children and parents) by adopting more optimistic outlooks. In our experience, children with positive outlooks are healthier, more resilient and tend to reach higher academic outcomes as they don’t allow negative self-talk to stop them! This is worth exploring:

http://stress.about.com/od/optimismspirituality/a/optimismbenefit.htm

Martin Seligman, the great expert in this area puts it so well:

“It’s a matter of ABC: When we encounter ADVERSITY, we react by thinking about it. Our thoughts rapidly congeal into BELIEFS. These beliefs may become so habitual we don’t even realize we have them unless we stop to focus on them. And they don’t just sit there idly; they have CONSEQUENCES.”

We believe these skills can be taught at any age and will benefit children for the rest of their lives. Call us on 0409911135 or 92777596 or email me on victoriacarlton@iinet.net.au for a comprehensive flyer about this course. Our next EQ4KIDZ course will commence next Tuesday: 21-1-20

 

 

 

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The ABC of Child Whispering: T is for Tension

Children are no strangers to stress and tension. Because they are ‘time-poor’ they have very little down time to process their feelings and concerns. The tension we feel as parents and teachers is unfortunately shared with children.

Our obsessions with their academic results and exams have caused children to question their self-worth, their intellectual ability and to doubt their ability to cope with school.

Stessed  children learn less so everyone loses!

I have assessed many new children over the last 3 months and a common thread runs through most of these sessions – tension.

So many kids are tense, worried, tell me they are failing and CAN’T DO their work. They describe themselves as “dumb” and “stupid” and really cannot perceive they could possibly be smart, successful or able to overcome their difficulties.

Sadly – something all these children share is average to high intelligence and incredible gifts in:

  • music
  • gymnastics/dance/sporting ability
  • the ability to generate amazing ideas for writing
  • really high artistic ability
  • high problem solving skills

Their creative thinking skills are off the scale and yet they know we don’t value these gifts!

Why don’t we?

The world needs these creative gifts like never before!

Why do we consign these brilliant kids to the educational trash heap?

Sure – they often DO learn differently.

This means I have to think differently when I plan their lessons and I have to teach differently. I get kids writing and spelling words in bright colours, tracing them in sand-pits, on a giant white board etc and I’m happy to provide all these learning tools because this is HOW they learn. So, if children learn differently we all need to teach differently. We can’t keep consigning these kids to the educational rubbish bin.

I LOVE working with these super-smart kids. and I have to help them let go of the tension and negative thoughts they have built up around their academic achievement. It is a privilege to work with them.

I teach them to physically relax using kinesiology exercises, learn to adopt a positive mind set and  I utilise art and journalling therapies to help with self-expression .

Its only after they can relax and drop the tension around academic matters that our children can truly start the remediation process. These kids need to be healed from the very education system that was supposed to help them!

We owe it to the future to roll back the tension levels kids feel. it just makes the learning process so much slower. ALL kids can be helped to see their own skills and to realise they ARE smart they DO matter and they CAN succeed.

 

 

 

 

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HAPPY CHILDREN = BETTER ACADEMIC RESULTS

New mindset new results motivational phrase sign on old wood with blurred background

Our EQ4KIDZ course leads to better academic results. This is because children develop an I CAN attitude and therefore stop holding back in the classroom.

They are more positive, resilient and improve general self-esteem and develop an I CAN attitude.

This course teaches kids to understand themselves and develop more positive attitudes.

EQ4KIDZ is offered in Australia and SE Asia. Our goal has always been the same: To help all children reach their potential.

Students are led through art and drama activities, proven to help them understand themselves and others.

Training is also available for schools. We can provide trained teachers to run this transformative course in schools and we are also available to go into schools and train staff.

Readers who are interested in enrolling children in this course can contact ICE on 9271 4200 or email International Centre for Excellence iceinfo@iinet.net.au

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SAD CONVERSATIONS

bambino disperato si copre il voltoAlmost everyday I have sad conversations with parents and children about school work and homework they cannot understand.

A little challenge is healthy but to be constantly confronted with work they have no chance of succeeding with is just plain depressing. Then – just to rub salt in the wound, the NAPLAN results arrive and another nail is driven into the coffin of self-esteem!

F grade and a sad smilie, written in red letters in a spiral pad, shallow DOF

Of course there are curriculum guides that tell teachers the content expected to be mastered at different grade levels BUT a teacher’s task is always to take a child metaphorically by the hand and lead them through the curriculum. If they have not reached a certain stage you cannot just MAKE this happen. Children need to be given work they CAN do and then be shown how to get to the next level.

Children are not machines to be suddenly accelerated by a switch. They are wonderful gifts from God for us to nurture, love and lead gently through the education maze.

There is NOTHING more demeaning than to not be able to do school work all day (with classmates teasing and goading) and then to be given homework that you can’t do either. Schools need to be aware of how many families spend hours on homework tasks every night with resultant frustration and tears. These kids are not getting time to play, chat, daydream and generally be kids.

There is very little evidence that copious amounts of homework help children at all. Reading, practising basic spelling, phonics and times tables is appropriate. Any more than 30-40 minutes per evening is too much and children under 8 should have even less.

We need to stop robbing children of their childhoods and help them at point of need.

That’s why tuition that targets specific skills not understood, and that builds self-confidence and self-esteem really works!

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Treating kids like rubbish!

“Your son is absolutelycrumpled paper no good at anything!”

I was chatting to one our Mums this evening and she told me of a very sad incident. It concerned her young son and his classroom teacher.

The classroom teacher told the mother, “Your child is absolutely no good at anything. He is not good at reading, writing, maths, art or even physical education.”

The mother gave the best answer possible, “Whatever,” and grabbed a piece of writing paper from the teacher’s desk. She crumpled the paper into a ball and held it up for the teacher to see. “My son is like this crumpled piece of paper. You and this school have completely crushed his spirit and he has folded up deep inside himself.”Then she threw it in the bin and left.

She knows from her mother’s heart and brain that her son has strengths and weaknesses just like any child. She knows that given encouragement and a loving and nurturing learning environment, he will thrive.

This incident took place in a Church school. I think they need to remember the words of Jesus, their leader,

“Then Jesus called for the children and said to the disciples, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children.”

No wonder this child has no confidence and has given up. At the moment he believes he is useless and it now our job to help him re-build his fractured self-esteem.

How sad that a teacher can behave in this way. Educators are meant to teach and build children up- not crush their beautiful spirits.

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